I have TOO much to talk about.

Back on December 2, 2011, I wrote a very long blog. I even broke it into "chapters" for you to read in small doses. I sort of feel like today's blog could be like that, but I'm determined to keep it shorter, if possible.

Here are some short versions of what I want to say:
1. We loved the new lady doctor and will not switch.
2. My BP was fantastic, 119/68. Yay!
3. My cholesterol was OK.
4. My fasting sugar was higher than ever, 100. I usually get in the 80s or low 90s. The upper limit for normal is 99, so it's not far from that. In fact, the accuracy might be +/- a few points, making the 100 OK; HOWEVER, the new doctor did NOT like it. She is saying the weight gain is bringing on diabetes. She does not believe in "pre-diabetes." She says that on that day I was/am a diabetic. BIG UGH!
5. I was up 6 pounds from my last visit in December, which raised the triglycerides as well as the sugar. It just shows that I was eating out of control for those four months.
6. She said to join Weight Watchers and lose 45 pounds ASAP. She will be happy if I weigh 220.
7. Evey told me about a free phone app, RunKeeper. Fantastic! I used it this morning and walked 30 minutes at 8 a.m. with my Beatles music playing. I went 1.33 miles in 30 minutes.
8. I found a free app for the iphone called LoseIt. It's similar to the Weight Watchers app with three advantages that I love: 1) It's FREE; 2. Lots of foods are in there, including popular restaurants, plus there's a barcode scanner for products that aren't pre-programmed; 3) It counts calories not points; 4) And did I mention it's FREE???

When we left the doctor's office, I texted Evey the news, especially the bad news that perhaps diabetes is creeping into my life. She couldn't respond until much later in the day due to the time difference and her work schedule, but once again, she hit the nail on the head. I LOVE HER! I got her permission again to post her email to me. So here it is along with my response.

Evey's email to me:

I got your text message, but I didn't really have anything nice to say so I didn't respond right away. I think the best thing for me to say is that I'm glad you like your doctor, and I hope you listen to her. If you are pre-diabetic maybe that will spark you to lose weight. You have been gaining uncontrollably again recently, and I don't think you see any reason to change your lifestyle right now. I have to agree with your doctor about weight watchers. Or therapy of some sort. I think you really need a personal trainer or a therapist or another outside person to be accountable to and work with you. You have shown you cannot do this on your own anymore.

I don't want to upset you, I just think it's good advice. I also think you guys eat out a lot. I know it's fun and you're retired and you can afford it, but... just because you can doesn't mean you should. Making good choices is part of being an adult. And you guys do eat out a LOT even if you don't think you do. I bet any therapist or weight watchers guide would tell you not to eat out so much.

Anyway. I hope you can find something that works for you because I want you to be around and mobile and independent for a long time. That's not in your future if you keep up your current lifestyle.

My response to this email:
Thanks for the email. Everything you say is always 100% correct. It shows how smart you are, but more importantly, it shows me how much you love me and care about me. You do not mince words, and I appreciate that. I love you, sweetheart. Obviously, my brain tells me that if I lose the weight, AGAIN, I will live longer and be more mobile. Of course, that's the right thing to do. I KNOW I'm a food addict, like a drug addict or an alcoholic. I make wrong choices. Haha!! The little Bad Idea Bears are always with me!

Well, I told the doctor I would join weight watchers. They meet every Wednesday morning here in Solivita. There's no reason not to join and every reason to do it. Still...I don't want to do that. I want to have the strength to do my own thing the way I did before. But I don't seem to be very successful anymore.

I was so scared about dying from the hernia. I'd like to hope that fear of living as a diabetic with all of those potential complications will get me back on track.

The good news is that I did extremely well today. I had my usual breakfast, then for lunch I had some cheese, four walnut halves, some carrot sticks, an orange, and some blueberries. I ate that in the car as we drove to the ball game. Then we went to Denny's for dinner where I'm always good. I got even better because usually I eat the garlic toast. This time I said hold the toast, and Dad and I split his. Then, also, he always gives me his croutons out of his salad, so he told them to hold his croutons. I bet I saved 150 calories or more by eating only half the croutons and half the bread that I usually eat.

We do eat out a LOT. I know that. Dad and I have talked about it. We know we can cut back on some occasions, but other times, there's just no other options. What really has to happen is that I need to learn how to eat out and make better choices. That seems SO HARD for me, but it's the answer.

Also when I was losing weight seriously in '09, I walked five or six days a week. I have stopped doing that, so I need to get back to that. As it gets hot here, there is still the treadmill and the indoor track. There's no excuse for not walking except that I don't build it into my schedule. I used to do it on the way home from work and now I don't have that built in time frame. Well...no excuses, but that's what I think.

Thanks again for the email and the love I hear in it. This is the second time you have kicked my ass in an email. Never apologize or feel bad about it. I need it and you do it especially well!!

Yes, she can kick my ass especially well, and I love it. I have included some pictures of her and me from the last few years. Love you, Evey, and thanks for everything.