Watch this space...Here's the BIG NEWS NOW!!

Later today I have my first appointment with the radiation oncologist. Mark will drop me off and head to his four month follow up appointment with his cardiologist following his takotsubo episode back on January 30. In May, he was told he had fully recovered, following a nuclear stress test. He was told to go about his normal life and come back in four months, so that's today.

I will continue on this same post tonight when I can report the news from my radiologist and Mark's cardiologist. Watch this space for more news tonight.

OK, I'M BACK FROM THE RADIATION ONCOLOGIST. HERE'S ALL THE SCOOP!!

First of all, Dr. Dziuba is GREAT! I really think very highly of him. Also, the St. Agnes Cancer Care Center is very beautiful and very friendly. They tried very hard to make me feel comfortable.

So...here's what I learned.

All of the pathology is back so now we know everything.

1. They got a clean margin and the papillary tumor is no concern because it was right at the edge. The cauterization of the wound zapped it. It really is a non-issue.

2. One node definitely has cancer. 1 out of 15 nodes.

3. The tumor was Positive for Estrogen, Positive for Progesterone, and Negative for HER2. Those are all good things.

4. I am stage IIA, T-1. IIA means the tumor is less than 2 cm and the cancer has spread to the lymph nodes. T-1 means there was a tumor and it waas small. All in all, that's not bad either. Five year survival rates for this staging is 86%. Pretty good odds, I guess.

Dr. Dziuba, the radiation oncologist, said that I will have 36 daily radiation treatments. Numbers 1-28 will be directed at the entire breast and numbers 29-36 will be targeted only at the site of the surgery. These radiation treatments will begin in about two weeks UNLESS I do chemo.

Now about the chemo: I'm still in a daze and depressed about this. Of course, until I speak with Dr. Griffiths, the medical oncologist on Thursday, chemo is still somewhat up in the air, BUT it's getting closer and closer. Dr. Dziuba said that typically if there is even one node with cancer, there is chemo. Dr. Griffiths had said the same thing at our original multi-disciplinary team meeting back on August 19. So, it's in one node. According to the book, said Dr. Dziuba, I will have chemo.

How much? Four to eight months! YIKES. It could be on a 2 week cycle, which would go four months, but it could be on a longer cycle and spread out over up to 8 months. Dr. Griffiths will discuss this with me on Thursday, and I'll let you know.

Once the chemo and radiation is over, there will be years of oral meds to take because of the positive hormone status.

So, to sum it up, the order is this:
Two more weeks of surgical recovery
Four to eight months of IV chemo
One month to recover
Six weeks of daily radiation
One month to recover
Two to five years of oral meds

That's what Dr. Dziuba said, and I sat there in a daze, a fog, a sad and depressed state.

Of course, if I go for chemo, and at this point it seems likely that I will, I will never see Dr. Dziuba again. So sad. I like him. I will need to find new doctors in Florida and move on to a new facility and new caregivers in mid-treatment. I'm not happy about that, but I see no other options. I really don't want to stay here for the whole thing. It's just too long. Without chemo, I would have been heading home by Thanksgiving, but with chemo the whole course of treatment is a minimum of 8 months and a maximum of 12 months, not counting the years of oral meds. That's just too long to stay here.

Of course, the chemo thing is not 100% yet, but it sure looks more likely.

Since we accidentally double-booked today, Mark had to go to his cardiology appointment. He got a clean bill of health, was told to buy a blood pressure monitor for up here (we have one in FL) to track it, and to come back in four months. Still, it meant that when I finished my appointment today at 2:20, I had to sit by myself until 4 p.m. until Mark could get back to me. That was a L-O-N-G time alone in the waiting room with my thoughts. My thoughts were sad, depressed, lonely, and mad. I texted the kids. Evey and I had several back and forth texts, which was fun because it kept my mind occupied. I had my Kindle, magazines, and pamphlets to read, but I couldn't focus on them.

When Mark finally came to get me, I decided I needed a Starbucks latte, so off we went. I ordered a grande, but they accidentally gave me a Venti. Oh, well...I drank a toffee mocha venti latte, NOT sugar free, NOT fat free, AND a Marshmallow Krispie treat. OY! Drowning my sorrows in sugar. I also ran into one of my former co-workers, so Alicia was the first to learn all my news. It was really GREAT running into her at the Starbucks.

Then we shopped at the Giant and the liquor store. We got many kinds of wine and beer. I will be drinking some moscato wine with dinner as well as later tonight. I might very well get buzzed. I don't think there is anybody out there who will begrudge me a little self-pity and wine.

I had a nice long conversation with my sister Flyn, on the cell phone in the car driving home, which will be totally illegal in MD as of Friday. That was fun. She was very sympathetic, which was nice. She agreed that I have every right to be mad. Evey reminded me that I'll be cured, so did Flyn. I know. I truly believe that I will be cured. I know it, but I am still really pissed off and dreading how awful it's going to be for the next six to twelve months getting there.

So that's the news until Thursday. Not as good as it could have been, but it's not a death sentence. It's just another big bump in the road.