Hair Loss

I'm obsessing about the hair loss now. Every since I realized Friday that I could easily pull hairs out, I've been thinking about it. It's inevitable, but it's bringing on some new emotions. Mark and I are both thinking about this hair loss a lot. I think it's going to be sad on Sunday after all, and I'm glad I am having family to surround me at the time.

Yesterday morning I felt a lot of hair falling out when I showered. I'm really glad now that I cut it so short, or I'm sure it would have made a big clog in my sister's drain. I'm sure the same thing is going to happen this morning. When I looked at myself in the mirror this morning, my hair was standing out all over in funky tufts. I naturally pulled at one. It didn't hurt at all to pull it out of my head, finding the tuft in my fingers. It was like looking at our cattle dog or our rabbit when they were all tufty during the season when they shed. Yup, I'm shedding! My head kind of itches and tingles. I think my scalp wants to get the hair out of there now.

On the other hand, I'm trying to think positive thoughts about how the chemotherapy is definitely working in my body. It's killing my hair follicles, so it must be killing any lurking cancer cells, too. At least that's the game plan!

Today should be mostly lazy. I am going to watch some TV, take a walk, read a book, try not to pull hair out! Tonight will be a big adventure. Although I'm not entirely sure I'm up to this big adventure, I wanted to do it anyway. MAD's production of Sound of Music opened last night. I just couldn't resist trying to find a night to go see a lot of my friends in the show. So we picked tonight. It will be a long night out, and a late night drive home for an hour. Normally I do not like to do this now with chemotherapy dragging me out at night, but I'm going to do this one.

This is a show that I always wanted to be in. I always wanted to play the Mother Abbess and sing Climb Every Mountain. Timing is everything. When the show was announced, I thought I couldn't do it because we'd be moving to Florida. Later I realized that the breast cancer diagnosis would have taken it off the table even if we hadn't moved. Oh, well...

I know the show will be great. I just hope I can stay awake and make it home safely. I'll let you know tomorrow.